getcha thinking

Some insight into your head today at Alas, a Blog. In brief, PinkDreamPoppies is exploring the ways we read and hear voices in our head corresponding to either knowing the gender of the speaker or making an assumption based on what is written. An example:

When most people read they hear the written words spoken in their minds. A disembodied vocal of authors, narrators, and characters fills their minds' ear acting out plays and essays, novels and poems. Blogs are composed with words and so are no exception to the rule, so chances are that you're hearing a voice right now.

Sometimes the voices that readers hear are the voices of actual people. Mothers speak with familiar tones in letters to their children, and stories traded between friends are still heard as though over the phone even if read alone in silence. Some actors, even, can take over a character so that no matter what voice readers may have heard before they cannot help but hear the actor's now. How many Harry Potter fans will always hear Alan Rickman when they read Severus Snape? How long with Lawrence Olivier be Hamlet?

Usually, though, the voices people hear are new, unique, and private. Each reader hears his or her own version of a character's voice that is created from the reader's perception of the character's gender, age, race, ethnicity, personality, history, and personal appearance and how these things interact to create a whole person. These perceptions on the part of the reader can be the difference between a sympathetic character and one the reader hopes gets side-swiped by a bus. Everyone bring prejudices to the table while reading; people will inflict their views of blacks and whites and Hispanics or men and women or the rich and the poor on the characters.

Honestly, this has really got me thinking. It's made me focus on how I read and understand what's in front of me, and I'm still a little baffled as to how I hear things in my head.

I'd like to think I read, regardless of gender, pretty fairly and giving the author the benefit of the doubt. Since I commented on the post in question, I've changed my mind. There, I said that I was consciously aware of how I interpreted the other commenters based on the apparent gender of their name. In retrospect, I've discovered it takes a genuine effort for me to truly hear a gendered voice in my head; even when reading someone whose speaking voice I am accustomed to, such as Jerry, I have a hard time imagining his voice to go along with it. It is not that I can't remember the sound of his voice, but rather that the two, his writing style and his speaking style, are disconnected in my brain. I can bring to mind something Jerry has said to me and hear it in his voice, but it is not so with his writing. On IM, when speaking to a close friend, the same is true, although it's easier to bring their voices to mind. It might have something to do with the person: Jason's voice I can easily bring to mind, and Sheena's, but with Val I have a harder time. This is arbitrary, I'm not sure why it works that way.

In any case I think I might be a bit of an exception to the rule. Since learning to read, I can't remember a time when I didn't have a book in hand, and my early social development was slow and rather intellectual. This didn't always go over well with girls and boys my age, and as a consequence I became less sure of my social ability, retired to my books, bam, vicious cycle. Even today, when I have become more sure of myself and my speaking abilities, I have trouble relating or carrying on a conversation with people whose social development has focused more on vocal communication.

But, I can't deny that knowing the gender, race, or sexual orientation of an author will affect my perception of that person. Fortunately, I've developed a modicum of fairness in my own thoughts in regards to race and gender and so on to not so much as judge said person for their background as look at them as having a unique perspective on the matter at hand. This has taken loads of work, overcoming whatever socialization I've had about blacks, hispanics, gay men, literary women, etc., to the point where I definitely favor and agree more with, say, a black woman talking about the effects of racism than a white, scholarly type (man or woman) using the same topic. Of course, that's to say that experience is just as valid, or more so, than research and statistics.

As far as reading a novel goes, unless the author gives a detailed description of the character I have to build scenery and appearance in my own mind before I can give that person a voice. For me, it always starts with the visual and then goes to the aural. This might tie into my struggles with ear training and playing by ear in music; unless I can see it and play with it visually, I have trouble immediately recognizing certain pitches and so on. Not to say that I can't learn to do these things-I have some varied history of actually being good at sightsinging or dictation, but these occurred when I was actively working and concentrating almost solely on aural skills. I think that's why I did so poorly in theory- I had a hard time switching back and forth between the analytical and intellectual aspects of Hyer (bleh) and the brief episodes of ear training that were thrown inbetween without a firm aural base to begin with. Which just goes to show you, I'm no good at multi-tasking mentally. Can't be sitting here blogging all day either, and then expect to do math with any kind of accuracy. Blog everything in my head when I don't have a social life of any equal measure to the time I spend on the internet. Nerd.

Hmm, I realize that PDP's post was much more thought-provoking and all. It's more of a stream-of-consciousness here. Said in my head, of course, in my own beautiful voice which I realize sounds nothing at all like my actual speaking voice. Which when played back for me, is annoying and squeaky. Naturally, everyone hates their own voice, yeah? You never sound like you really want to. But that's a post for another time.