ups and downs

In the shower this morning I got all sad because I remembered last Thanksgiving and hanging out with Jerry and his family, and it was tons of fun. Unlike this Thanksgiving, which will be a long day of cooking (but I'm making zucchini curry for myself!) followed by a meal in which I will inevitably piss off my father, and then we will clean up and spend the rest of the evening in separate rooms watching TV.

Then I realized that I didn't have to be anywhere today and starting practicing, and I was (sort of) happy again. Then Prof David Jackson, at UM, called me, and talked to me about studying with him. He was super nice and definitely made me more interested in the program (it was at the bottom of my list, to be sure). After I finished up practicing I wrote up my repertoire list, personal statement, and revised my performance resume, and packaged off my UM application! It's done baby, and only two left to do, but now that I've written the PS they'll be easy. Then I have to get started on financial aid forms.

Yesterday I had a moment. I realized that it was silly of my to be working the JC Penny job when I was offered a very lucrative gig playing trombone for twice as much money as I would make in a weekend picking up clothes. So I got offered a job doing what I want to be doing professionally and instead I got a minimun wage job folding sweaters? WTF, mate? All because I was little bit afraid, not of going to Mexico or whatnot, but of giving up my weekends. What the hell do I do on weekends anyway? Jack shit. Nothing, zip, nada. So I'm full of it, and I need the money. So I asked the guy if he still needed me, and he does. And he's willing to work out the weekends I need off to go to auditions. Unfortunately I forgot to tell him I wouldn't be starting this weekend but next, so I hope he's not pissed off at me that I replied with, oh well um shit, sorry, can't do it this weekend.

This means I have to talk to Penneys, which I'm not too worried about. The thing is, I'm holiday help and the only real disappointment they might have is that my mom works there and I don't want her to be embarrassed or anything. But still, if another of their employees was offered a job doing something related to their field of study, they wouldn't hold them, would they? I'm stepping up, right? I'm also justifying this with "since I'm not too sure what I want to do right now, I should try lots of different things." Maybe Penneys'll want me still to come in like once a week. Whatever, ain't gonna say no to more money. I do have to get Mexican auto insurance, and I'm not sure how much that's going to cost me, but my first Penney's check should hopefully cover it. Besides, the reasoning in my head goes like this:

I have reworked my understanding of this year off to be solely for the purpose of my trombonal improvement. This means I get to freeload off my parents whilst practicing as much as possible and making a little bit of money to tide me over. Working at Penneys does not allow me to practice as much as I need. While it does get me out of the house and away from the continuous TV noise (Matlock and Murder She Wrote reruns, oh my), it also keeps me on my feet for eight hours and away from my trombone for precious practicing time. Ok, so I'm totally riding on privilege. And I'd love to get a place of my own. But I'm going to be patient, and use this year to improve musically so that I get into a school AND get the money I need to finance it. With the TJ gig I have all week to hang out and practice (and can still coach), to get things done, etc, and I get to play a sweet gig with cool music. I think I was silly for passing it up. Plus I don't really care if I piss of JC Penney. If I have to hear that stupid Outkast song one more time while reorganizing the pink shirts that are too crowded on the four-way rack I will run down the hallway screaming and brandishing a hanger. What's cooler than cool? My foot jammed up your ass, Outkast.

AND THE EXCITEMENT OF THE DAY IS:
Josh Chappie has just offered me a ticket to see Bela Fleck tomorrow night!!!!!!!!!!!
Wowie wow wow. yeah. All I can say.
Friend of the Day: Josh Chappie